Don’t tell me what to do with my boobs | World Breastfeeding Week

Can we just say it? Breastfeeding is one of those topics that comes with an absolutely unnecessary amount of performance anxiety. There’s the guilt, the unsolicited opinions, the “have you tried nipple shields?” crowd, and the occasional emotional breakdown in the middle of a Tesco car park.

And honestly? It’s a lot.

So, this World Breastfeeding Week, we’re not here to give you a perfectly curated how-to. We’re here to say:

You’re allowed to take it one feed, one pump, one panic Google at a time. 

At femme, we talk a lot about knowing your flow - but that doesn’t stop at periods. Your postpartum flow matters just as much. Some women breastfeed with ease. Others struggle, switch to formula, mix feed, pump, cry, try again, give up, and then feel guilty about it all.

Spoiler: all of that is normal.

What works for you might not be what your friend did. What worked yesterday might feel impossible today. And what you need tomorrow might surprise you. But that’s not failure. That’s motherhood. 

Sure, breastfeeding can be beautiful and bonding and magical. But breastfeeding can also feel like having a small, unpredictable piranha attached to your chest at 3am.

We want to be real about the both/and:

• You can love your baby and still hate breastfeeding.

• You can choose formula and still be an incredible mother.

• You can breastfeed for two years and still have hard days where you resent every second.

You’re allowed all of it. And you’re doing better than you think.

Breastfeeding gets talked about like it’s either a magical bonding moment or a total nightmare. The reality? Most of us are somewhere in the sticky, leaky, slightly‑sweaty middle.

It’s not just about “feeding your baby naturally”, it’s about suddenly living in a body that feels both miraculous and slightly out of your control. It’s the cracked nipples, the stone‑hard engorgement, the uninvited let‑downs (AKA milk ejection reflex), in the middle of a Zoom call. It’s leaking through your top at brunch and wondering if you’ll ever wear a non‑padded bra again. It’s loving the closeness one second and silently counting down until the latch is over the next.

And the opinions? Oh, they will come. Nurse in public? Someone will tell you to cover up. Switch to formula? Someone will gasp. Combination feed? Congratulations, you’ve managed to upset both camps. Truly, you cannot win, so why are we still trying?

Breastfeeding is wildly personal. Some people feed exclusively from the breast for years. Some pump like it’s a full‑time job. Some manage a few weeks before their mental health waves a white flag. All of these are valid. All of these are motherhood.

It’s okay if you use a nipple shield. It’s okay if you don’t. It’s okay if you feed lying down at 2am because your spine is giving up on you. It’s okay if you stop altogether. You do not owe anyone a timeline, an explanation, or a photo‑worthy moment.

And no, breastfeeding is not free. It costs time, sleep, energy, and often, a solid chunk of your sense of bodily autonomy. That’s why support matters. Not just “You’re doing great!” texts (though we love those), but the hands‑on kind. Someone to bring you water, make you lunch, or take the baby so you can shower. Someone to say, “If you stop, you’re still an amazing mum.”

So if you’re in the thick of it this World Breastfeeding Week, whether you’re loving it, hating it, or living somewhere in‑between ,hear this: your worth as a mother has nothing to do with how, or how long, you breastfeed. You are already enough.

And you health and wellbeing is part of this journey too.

We’re not selling bottles, bras, or breast pumps. But femme is here for women at every hormonal milestone - and trust us, postpartum is one hell of a milestone.

Whether you’re three weeks in or three years out, your hormones, body, energy and identity are going through something massive. And you deserve more than platitudes or Pinterest advice. You deserve community, honesty, and support without strings. 

1. Fed is best. Full stop.
   Don’t let anyone’s feed (online or otherwise) convince you otherwise.

2. Your body has done enough.
   However you fed your baby today - bottle, breastfeed, both - that’s enough. So are you.

3. Hormones are real and ruthless.
   Crying over spilled milk (literally)? Blame the prolactin. And maybe get some chocolate.

4. Rituals can save you.
   Five minutes of skincare. A supplement. A matcha. A slow walk. Tiny moments = survival.

5. You’re not supposed to have this all figured out.
   You’re learning your baby and yourself, in real time. Trust the messy process.